Searching for a Hobby

I think something important I've been learning is to have something for myself, to keep my "identity." It was recommended by my therapist, too. So, over the past week or two, Mitchell and I have been discussing a hobby for me. We are taking this a bit seriously because we want it to be successful. I have a tendency to start things, but never finish them, or even to do tons of research for something, but never actually start it. That is causing us to take our time to find something that I'm really interested in and capable of doing. As part of the process, Mitchell had me make a list of all the hobbies I could think of. He encouraged me to think outside the box and even put things that I probably wouldn't be able to do or even want to do, just to get the ideas flowing. Here's the list that I made (it's REALLY long):

• photography
• gardening
• music - singing, piano, viola, etc.
• running/marathon training
• yoga
• sewing
• scrapbooking
• cooking/baking
• cake decorating
• crocheting/knitting
• beauty - trying new hair styles, makeup techniques, nail art tricks, etc.
• get a pet
• painting
• drawing/sketching
• woodworking
• dance
• beading/jewelry making
• pottery
• home design
• home repair
• housework
• reading
• writing
• crafting
• travel/sightseeing
• learn a language
• family history
• blogging
• journaling
• cross-stitch
• video games
• watching movies/tv shows
• quilting
• fashion
• party planning 
• hiking
• rock climbing
• martial arts/kickboxing
• model/dollhouse building
• film/make videos
• cycling
• weight-lifting
• swimming
• auto mechanics
• computer/technology stuff
• camping
• calligraphy
• aviation
• teaching
• hang-gliding
• volunteering
• activism - charities, politics, causes, etc.
• antiquing
• surfing
• scuba-diving
• ballooning
• learn a new instrument
• landscaping
• candle making
• art - collage, pastel, sculpture, abstract, etc.
• acting
• shooting
• hunting
• taxidermy
• floral arranging
• glass blowing
• stained glass
• story-telling
• study psychology
• chemistry
• astrology
• astronomy
• nutrition/diet science
• art history
• architecture
• boating/sailing
• racing
• roleplaying
• board gaming/ card games
• basket weaving
• collecting
• puzzles - word, picture, number, etc.
• play pool
• horseback riding

Do you have any hobbies to add to this list?

New Blog Direction

"Therefore this is thy gift: apply unto it..." D&C 8:4

I've decided to take this blog in a more focused direction. One of my biggest struggles is feeling like I have purpose and knowing where to go with my life. During one of my therapy sessions, my therapist asked me what my ultimate goal was. I took my time to think about the question because it's such a big one, but I still knew it was the first thing that came to my mind: to be the best mom. My whole life, I wanted to be a wife and a mother. Now I am, but I take these blessings for granted too often. My therapist recommended that I keep this ultimate goal in mind when I am trying to figure out what to do with myself or I am getting stuck in the minute details of life. So I've decided to make this blog a way to chronicle my journey towards becoming  a better mother.

 These children are a gift from God and I want to cherish this gift.

Lists

I've been going to therapy once a week and it's been helping me a lot. Everything that has happened combined with the treatment I am receiving has been making me much more introspective. I'm constantly having to stop and really THINK about why I'm acting the way I am. Today my therapist and I were talking about ways for me to overcome my compulsions to make lists and to focus only on minute details. She told me to throw away my lists. When she said that, I thought I might pass out. I'm already trying to write fewer lists and I deleted one off my computer when I came home. It was really difficult... and I wrote it out again a few hours later. I have so many lists for what I'm going to do each day and I choose which list to use based on a specific set of circumstances. But I frequently end up stressing myself out because the circumstances change or I don't feel like following a list or something throws me off what I'm doing and then I don't know what list to follow. I used to just make simple to-do lists, but sometime over the past years they began to rule my life instead of helping it. I feel like this is going to be one of  the most difficult obstacles I deal with in my life, and it's a bit scary, but I'm glad I have good help with working on it.